In his book “Mars and Venus on a Date,” John Gray provides an interesting (and somewhat controversial) guide on how to navigate from dating to creating a loving and lasting relationship. One issue that often arises is what a woman should do if the man does not call back after their first date.
Gray recommends:
- Don’t call if you are upset with him for not calling.
- If you do call, try not to ask questions or talk about the relationship. Instead, he recommends that you let the man know some good feelings. Let him know you enjoyed the activity. When a man feels he has been successful, he is more attracted to the woman.
Questions NOT to ask after a first date:
- Are you seeing someone else?
- Do you want to spend more time with me?
- Did you have a good time? Do you like me?
- How much time do you have available for a relationship? Are you busy this week? What are you doing next weekend? When would you like to get together again?
What to talk about:
- Talk about what happened, not about him. For example, “I really liked the movie we saw.” Do not talk about him or say that you liked spending time with him. The less pressure he feels to spend time together, the more it frees his desire to spend more time together.
- Let him know the positive responses you had and leave out the negative. If he feels he is succeeding, he will form an emotional bond of affection.
- Ask for advice. Don’t give advice on anything. Men like to feel that they can offer some expertise. The more competent a man feels in the presence of the woman, the more attracted he will be to her.
- Ask for his help. Don’t offer to help him in any way. According to Gray, when a woman calls to offer help, she loses him. If she calls to get help, he will feel complimented.
What do you think of John Gray’s advice? What is your experience? I’m looking forward to hearing your thoughts!
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Interested in a different perspective? Check out these links: The Rebuttal from Uranus | Those Martian Women!